Halloween Scrooge

I think the last time I dressed up for Halloween was when I was 14 or so. I was a "punk" - more Punky Brewster than Johnny Rotten. I got to spray my bangs really high and put colors and glitter in it. I remember that it started raining - sharp, cold, needles of rain and I was chilled to the bones and soaking wet. My hands were stained navy blue from the GAP bag I used to hold my candy. That pretty much was the end of Halloween for me. M has continued to party on and has been Cat Woman and Laura Croft. Yeah, she's pretty hot.

It's now about avoiding being at home (we live a block away from an elementary school) and trying to keep Petunia from totally losing her voice from barking at all the kids "trespassing" on our property. How dare they walk on the sidewalk!

While I'm going to be recruiting on Halloween night (corporate costume), I got to thinking about what I would be if I did dress up for Halloween. I would LOVE to be Wonder Woman. So, that's definitely high on the list. My friend was like, "good luck, all the gays want to be Wonder Woman for Halloween." That could be true because I did see a trannie Wonder Woman the last time I was at P-Town. I didn't see any good costumes when I went out with N last night to look for a police woman costume for her - wee-oo-weee-ooo-weee! Lots of fun Sarah Palin costumes but the high voltage lewdness of some of the costumes took me aback! The "Snake Charmer" had a snake coming out of his crotch!

I'm also kinda cheap when it comes to Halloween (and like to be warm and comfortable). I started to think about what I could be without spending a lot of money. I love the costume where you are in all blue and covered with tampons and maxi pads - Picasso's Blue Period.

My brother has a blonde mullet wig and Doris was like, "you should be a lesbian! You could wear a flannel shirt with the sleeves cut off, mom jeans, socks and Birkenstocks!" M, "Can't you be something sexy?"

And then I was like, "oh, I could be the Wellesley stabber!" I've been trying to google her for months and have no idea what she looks like but I figured, I'd wear my glasses, have my hair a little disheveled, wear a Wellesley t-shirt and duct tape 7 knives to my puffer vest. M, "Can't you be something sexy?"

At the costume stores, I saw a pimp hat, stein, grills, cane, bling - I could wear that with my track suit! M, "Can't you be something sexy?"

Oh, well, I guess at least for this year, I'll just be a corporate recruiter.